Through the yellow curtain

Seeing the girls on Khao San!

Thailand has arrived and our 15-day free visa has almost passed its half-way expiry mark. Where does time keep dissapearing off to? Before we started this trip, I had my doubts that we'd last this long given that a free bed, food and home-comforts are just a stone-throw away. But after a few weeks of really getting into the groove, the idea of 'going home' becomes less and less appealing. Given, there were days of feeling sick as a dog, and wanting to be cradled and looked after, but there has to be a few dark days for the sun to shine.

We're in Chiang Mai at the moment, staying at a nice, clean and relatively cheap guesthouse 'JJ's' in the old quarter. Since my last post I left my detox-centre with a clear head and a heavy heart, whisked J out of Siem Reap with a pounding head from the night before, made it through the high-security barricades at immigration, braved Bangkok, survived the craziness of Khao San road, managed a rigorous 3-day trek, bathed elephants, discovered waterfalls, insect zoo's, flower farms, tiger sanctuary's, been chased down dark back-roads of the city with a mad-man and his knife, seen the latest Hollywood hit 'The Great Gatsby', lost our only bank card and got to know this city by day. Let's start from the beginning shall we?

Downwards dog at Hariharilaya

The detox-retreat was everything I wished it would be. Every day there would be a lecture/ a workshop on something fascinating. I won't go into details and spill all the secrets but a few interesting facts are in order. So the first night we had S, the resident magician/ hypnotist perform a show for us, we began sitting excitedly around the table and ended with bulging eyes and gaping mouths. It spurred on most people to take his 5-hour 'body language' workshop, that taught us the psychology behind magic and how we see, what we see. After taking the workshop every action people made was suddenly under scrutiny. Pupils dilating, heads nodding or shaking, the positioning of your hands or the way you stand - once you're aware of it, it adds a whole dimension to what someone's saying. You can tell whether someone's lying without listening to the words, or if someone's trying to intimidate you, flirt with you or manipulate you. It's interesting given that my books 'Brain Rules' by John Medina and 'Blink' by Malcolm Gladwell explore the same concepts - that in the blink of an eye, your unconscious 'intuitive' mind makes decisions about our surroundings before we can even process the thought. Based on the workshop, I will share this; in terms of attraction there are certain signs you can look for before you make your move, just to be sure they want it. Concerning boys, there's only one thing that you really have to look for, if they're staring at you - they want you (obviously under the right circumstances). More unnerving however are the actions you can't control, if the other persons pupils dilate (this applies to both sexes) they're attracted to you - the lighter your eyes, the easier you are to read; your pupils will naturally dilate in response as a sign of flattery, and vise versa.

Ommm

Signs to look for in girls are far more complex but once you know them you'll see them more often (I feel like I'm writing a column for cosmopolitan..). Gestures of submissiveness or vulnerability, like elongating the neck (an evolutionary explanation for this being, if your neck's on display, you're an easy target), fleeting looks, stroking phallic objects (like wine glasses, candles, bottles), biting/ licking your lip (as it's subconsciously what you want the other person to do to you) and many other things that just seem to make sense.

Another fascinating lecture was on The enneagram. A method of measuring your 'personality' type using a wheel with 9 options. Each option has many many layers and many connections to other numbers as we are all ultimately part of the same circle, hence we all share personality traits. Look into it online, some tests are too basic to label you a number, and it usually requires an objective opinion, but if you find out what you are it's amazing how accurate some of the descriptions can be. Here, see if the most basic explanations for each type grabs you and look up whether the description follows suit:

The Enneagram

1= The perfectionist

2= The helper

3= The achiever

4= The individualist

5= The observer

6= The loyalist

7= The adventurer

8= The leader

9= The peacemaker

The enneagram is based on some of the early teachings by Gurdjieff "a great influential spiritual teacher in the mid-20th century". In a way, knowing what type you're 'born into' puts you in a box of 'what and who you are'. But in another way, by understanding what box you're in, allows you to understand and utilize it, the whole goal of the enneagram is to reach the central point, and be centered, a mix of all 9 types.

Another lecture was simply a woman at the centre discussing very openly, her low points in life and her spiritual awakening. In her talk was included a great TedTalks on 'The power of vulnerability' by Brene Brown (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o).

Tuk Tuking round BKK

Some sessions were more physical, we learnt the basics of Thai massage, awkwardly thrusting and twisting each others bodies and hearing the squeamish crack of joints as they loosened .. After that particular day, we were all pumped up and stretched out, so Chase n Status blared in the yoga hall as we all practiced the work-out that our chiropractor had taught us earlier on how to strengthen our cores.. A sweaty end, a quick shower and a guided visualization meditation with a guide talking you through the steps of a story. Embarrassed to say I fell asleep pronto and woke up with 'well done everyone, dinner time'. It was welcomed with open arms as tummy's grumbled in suspense. The post-dinner angel cards popped up, and a few of us sat in a little circle giving 'tarot readings' and fantasizing about the results we'd found. The last card I pulled on my reading about 'what to do concerning next year' was Enchantment.. spurring on my decision to be another one of the many travelers we've met, to move to Aus, come September. The creator of the cards and The Californian archetype, 'Doreen Virtue PhD' smiled her generic smile from the card box and I wrinkled my brow.. still wandering what the PhD stood for..?

Meditation was, I'd say one of the largest focuses of the center. The importance of containing your energy, given that most of our time is spent exerting it, via using our eyes (our most dominant sense), talking, moving, eating etc. Sitting still and containing that energy, frustrating as it may be, is one of the biggest disciplines that exists. The importance of your hands and posture being imminent in the practice. Hands grow from your brain tissue when you're developing as a fetus hence they have a direct connection to your brain. Open hands allows the energy to flow out, closed hands keeps it inside and touching specific fingers (mudras) stimulates specific energy pathways within your nervous system (nadis), allowing you to activate different parts of the brain. One great meditation was listening to music that correlated with each individual chakra in turn, as you imagined it's colour and it's position in your body. A chakra translates to 'wheel' in sanskrit, and is a bundle of 'major plexuses' or arteries/ veins/ nerves within your body that corrugate in 'balls' - there are 7 that exist from your root to your crown and each is associated with a different colour. The experience was quite profound for many that endured it, while others just enjoyed the psytrancey goa'esque music.
A long day of meditation was our day of silence. Our diet for that day, so as to calm the mind, did not consist of any stimulating foods (like garlic, ginger or chilli). It was interesting to say the least, at times you feel a bit crazy, stuck in your own thoughts for hours on end with only books, yoga and meditation to entertain you. A guy we had breakfast with today put it perfectly 'when all your distractions are taken away and you're only left with a few, it's a profound experiencing seeing what 'greed' humans have in constantly wanting more/ something different', watching it in yourself is interesting..

The Plearning Museum

That day we had a talk on 'problems'. The quote of the day was 'something's only a problem if you make it one'. The example given was, if everyone's wearing a white shirt and only 1 is wearing a black one, where does your attention go to? We tend to notice the things that go wrong in our lives instead of all the things that go right - being mindful of gratitude we were taught, is key. Another way of seeing the white shirts, is focusing less on the impermanent objects around us, or the fleeting 'experience' that made us feel a certain way, but more the permanent space between the objects, or the multiple reasons that lead up to the experience - just something to think about.. The mediation later on was more light-hearted as we were instructed to let loose, waving our arms and 'hoo-hooing' whilst jumping up and down - it ended in fits of giggles and smiley faces.

The rest can be summarized in catalog form, the girls had a session of listening to 'El Sol' and 'Alt-J' whilst weaving dream catchers, we monged out at night to 'Cloud Atlas' - flinching but giggling at the sillhouettes of the rats above the white cloth on the ceiling chasing each other. The mango tree above us continued to drop their mangoes on our tin roof at night and the students of the 'Tantra' workshop shared their saucy tips. A tough work-out sesh lead to painful tummy cramps as I curled up on the floor with two cheeky lizards staring at me curiously from the sink, offering no help whatsoever. The nightlife continued until dawn as the frogs jumped around and the snakes slithered silently along the dusty roads.  And then the motorbike to take me to J was suddenly outside, hugs were exchanged and snacks for the journey were bought. I wondered around the hostel in the heat of Siem Reap, suddenly feeling the familiar stress of city-life again.

Tattoo time!

Our gaze met and a shaggy haired, hungover J ran towards me for a tight squeeze. Tickets were booked and we were whisked off to Bangkok - the rush continuing through the shabby border-town of Poi-Pet and the high security immigration that gave everyone chills after all the stories we'd heard about Thai prisons. We made it across and into our hotel, for $10 each p/n, in the center of the chaos of Khao San road. We had spring rolls to munch on the way, a disappointment as we bit into the red oily grizzle - a change from the fresh vegan food of Hariharilaya..

It was the first time we'd had AC in months, and we took full advantage of it, sleeping soundly under the covers, and waking up disoriented with no idea what time of day it was as the room had no windows and we had no clock. It was midday so we got  dressed and joined the hustle and bustle that Bangkok had to offer. We ended up bumping into many old friends from Otress, the dutch girls taking a photo with the noodle-lady, the English couple from our guesthouse walking past the golden arches and the boys, from J's night out in Siem-Reap browsing hippie pants at a little stall. We found cheaper digs after 'check-out time', making up stupid excuses for having to leave BKK, shuffling back hours later to reception (when our bus was supposed to have left) to collect our forgotten passports .. woops.

The weird rows of foot-massages
all over the street in BKK

Bangkok had it's highlights. 'The Plearning museum' - play/ learning that taught us of Thai culture through interactive games or activities, mango sticky lii down a little hidden road behind 'Wat-pho temple', where a tattoo artist was discovered, and a new tattoo was born on my right wrist, the Sanskrit symbol for 'White Tara' who represents compassion, healing and long life. We watched a ping-pong show, a range of expressions flying across our faces as she drew razor blades, ping-pong balls, UV string and darts out of her vaj.. she opened coca-cola bottles, smoked cigarettes, drew pictures and performed a multitude of other shocking acts, that she'd repeat every half an hour or so. It was amazing to see the skill of these women, but sad to see the boredom and complete lack of joy in their faces. The crowd was interesting to see too, sweet young couples, creepy-looking businessmen that had constant smirks on their faces and groups of girls on tour. One man next to me laughed repeatedly saying 'Oh sugar! Oh sugar!' as Californication played in the background.. that song will never be the same again.. The ping pong balls would occasionally fly onto peoples feet in the front row and their girlfriends/ wives would whip out hand sanitizer and wipe them down shaking their heads.

Giant stick insect!

We wandered around the clubs of Bangkok and returned to our dingy hostel, run by a French tattoo artist - the faint smell of cigarettes hung in the corridor and the broken banister swung from side to side as you held it. The beeps from the bathroom could be heard in jagged rythms as he played a game on his phone while sitting on the toilet, a man lay on the floor outside, passed out and snoring softly.. bet his head didn't feel great in the morning..

The next day we checked out, braised beef noodle soup for breakfast, ice-coffee, booked bus to Chiang Mai and chose to take a break from temples and check out the huge shopping mall 'The Pentagon'. It was funny looking around at the millions of shops and adverts, we could've been in KL - it was so overwhelming as consumerism takes over and you want everything. We ended up going bowling, getting lunch and checking out the book-shop, buying 'Brain Rules', 'Blink' and 'The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying' - all really inspirational. ATM problems followed (surprise surprise), and then a rush with our backpacks, running after a little lady through all the backstreets of Bangkok and to the bus station. We met 2 lovely travelers C and A, and we all settled in as the lady at the front of the bus made it clear that we were to have 'NO BEER/ ALCOHOL onboard!'. She then pressed play on the TV at the front of the bus to the movie 'G.I Joe', and everyone reclined their seats and went to sleep. We were awakened abruptly in Chiang Mai, attempting to hitchhike and avoid the extortionate tuk-tuk fee, ending up getting ripped off on a local bus and dealing with an angry tuk tuk driver at 6am that got lost in translation, expecting double the amount we'd agreed on, and finally checking in to 'JJ's'.

Giant flutterby

We'd had an early start but thought we'd keep the ball rolling. A yummy Italian coffee was well appreciated and we looked around at the city around us. It's all very narrow, divided into grids with the main square surrounded by a moat, overhung with beautiful orange-blossom trees. We rented a bike and headed up to check out all that there was to offer - we were overwhelmed with choices. Passing Tiger sanctuaries, Insect/ crocodile/ snake/ orchid and flower farms we didn't know what to choose. Based on morals and money we checked out the waterfall and the insect zoo. Arriving in the pouring rain, we christened the waterfall as we ran around, completely alone under the pounding water below, that carried the peaceful little stream above it. The insect zoo was interesting, giant cicadas, spiders, scorpions and stick insects scattered all over while the next door lead into a colorful storm of butterflies and flowers. The tiger sanctuary was appalling, watching people pay $10 to take a photo with the tiger, making no meaningful connection with the animal at all, as the workers hit them with sticks to keep them still and sedated. Luckily we still got to catch a glimpse of the beautiful creatures, without paying to support it.



Waterfalls in Chiang Mai



Our next 3 days were spent trekking through bamboo forests, to elephant camps and mountain-villages. We were with another Dutch couple, a lumberjack B (that came in very useful when slipping and sliding on dangerous hills) and gorgeous R. We all started off in the orchid farm before checking out the local market (and noticing how ridiculously clean the food is all kept compared to all the other countries in SEA), munching down breakfast and starting on our difficult trek up to the elephants! It surprised me how R and B managed to chain smoke while we all panted our way through sticks of bamboo, pulling ourselves up through dry leaves, and slipping down steep slopes. Stopping for lunch and sitting on banana leaves, learning how to make fire out of dry bamboo, suck water out of plants, make walking sticks, eat termites, laugh as J almost collided with a giant spider that was positioned right next to his head, get eaten alive by mozzies, blow bubbles from round leaves, shoot darts out of pointy leaves, pick our own bananas and herbs, cut footholds for climbing coconut trees, bathe and ride elephants while the one lazy water buffalo grazed on the grass, cook our own dinner, find mushrooms in elephant shit and catch fireflies when the moon came out (deep breath).

Our tour guide was lovely and very ADD, I suppose you have to be to keep your spirits and energy up for a group all day. Our second day of the trek was all uphill and left everyone completely breathless. We had our 2 guard-dogs (Buster and Ginge) trotting along next to us. We visited various waterfalls on the way, the first one on which we slid down and bathed, while the boys kept busy building their dam. Just as we got out of the water we spotted a long parasite, that are known to swim up cavities in your body and lodge in your intestines - great. After an exhausing day, on our last night we jammed around a fire, laughing as we tried to repeat multi-lingual tongue twisters, with flower fumes curling into the cold night air. We dozed off, covered in blankets, the sound of J's sniffles beginning to grow as the pigs squeeled nearby and the roosters continued to crow..

Our tour guide blowing bubbles out of a leaf :)

Whenever we ate a meal the skinny dogs would all come running, it was sad seeing what starvation does to animals and how instinctual it makes them. But our two buddies that were relatively healthy, trotted along with us till the end. A and I spent our last morning doing yoga together, rudely interrupted by N as we were hurriedly told that we had '10 minutes to eat breakfast and leave!'. So we rushed out of our downwards dog positions, inhaled our food and got our shoes on, only to peek into the kitchen and see N lying on the floor, breathing poppy fumes out of his bamboo pipe - yep, a rush indeed.. We hadn't bought towels, so the blankets became versatile, J's sneezes continuing to grow after a freezing cold night above the clouds. We walked on, away from the village with our bags, passing by the school that the village kids were building themselves. It was sad that a lot of the adults were either druggies or alcoholics who didn't seem to care much about re-vamping their surroundings, but the kids were making an effort at least?

We climbed down to a fairly crowded waterfall, sitting in the cold water and watching a little girl smash around her puppy that was shaking with cold fright, caught in her grasp. We tried to teach her to no avail as her mother smiled on happily watching her torturous daughter and the frightened puppy. We left the scene and made it down to the bottom, hopping on rafts after we were geared up with our helmets and oars. The locals were all sitting by the river having civilized picnics and splashing us playfully as we rushed by. We manouvered our way around other boats as our guide instructed us on what to do, a brown water snake slithered passed to my delight and we managed to make it down to the bamboo rafts unscathed. We floated along more leasurely until the road was in sight and it was time to hop off. The bags under our eyes were darkening and the ride back to the hostel involved no chatter as everyone zoned out to the hum of the traffic into a bumpy dream.

The kids building their w

We loved not having technology or distractions for 3 days, but a treat was in order and 'The Great Gatsby' played by the stunning DeCaprio was on at the cinema; I reminisced about HL English back at school as we withdrew money and headed off to a freezing cold mall. It was only after the movie that we realized the ATM had sucked up our only bank card, and cortisol levels rose as we tried to find someone to take us home and sort out the problem. We ended up in a tuk tuk where no one spoke English and we got further away from where we needed to be, so I stormed off, into the night of Chiang Mai, with J letting me get out of my strop and 'prove my sense of direction'. We'd been walking for ages and had gotten nowhere, before J came running past, shoes in hand, shouting 'Run! He has a knife!'. Adrenaline kicked in and we were running towards god-knows what. We escaped the drama on the back of a strangers motorbike, paying double what we would've paid if we'd taken the easy way out. A chilled sesh on the balcony was in order as we met another cool Aussie 'S', and crashed out in bed, falling into a lucid dream until morning came.

Chiang Mai by day is delightful, we discovered sweet hidden bookshops, buying 'Change Your Brain' By Tim Leary and finishing it that day, playing pool, having a munchathon at the local market that was a-light with cheap food everywhere you looked. We attempted to nab a free swim at the Shangri-La, but decided against it as our loose shirts and sruffy shorts gave our game away. We watched 'Iron Man 3' instead, played arcade games, enjoying the free AC and engaged in D&M conversations on our little balcony with an older American guy, our new mate D and S. On our last day the rain fell hard, knocking over all the street signs and blowing the leaves all over the road. We ran for it, exhilarated, back to our hostel; reading the signs and sensing the itch, we booked a bus to Pai, a beautiful town in Northern Thailand that was discovered by chance by a bunch of Hippies - sounds like our kinda place ;)

Recipe of the day: Gai Pad Grapow (Thai Basil chili chicken & rice)

http://thaifood.about.com/od/thaicookingessentials/r/Thai-Basil-Chicken-Stir-Fry-Easy.htm